1. I think I should bring a can of Easy Cheese with me next time I go up for communion. Spray a little cheese on my communion wafer. I wonder if the priest would immediately douse me with holy water.
2. I love how the McDonald's dollar menu has been resisting the forces of inflation going on a good decade. We should really think about putting Ronald McDonald in charge of the Fed, has to be better than Turbo Tax Timmy.
3. Why are guys who come on The Maury Povich show to see if "they are the father"...always bringing their mommy along with them?
4. Why do I think the reason "The Count" on Sesame street is obsessed with counting is because he has been alive for so so long? He is probably marking the days like a depressed prisoner.
5. Girl Scouts and Cookie Monster...a product commercial made in heaven. Way to miss that one Mad Men
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Daily Zen
Somewhere a PETA member is trying to work up some outrage.
So is this what a dog who loves hanging his head out of the car window dreams about? The dog in this picture is so relexed he looks like he is trying to see if there is a bird he can chase on the way down. Of course they tried to do this with a cat...Once.
Via
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Or Sins Forgiven, but at a Price!
Tatar Sauce - Jesus brand of "special sauce"
I won't even delve into the fact that the FoF contains multiple kinds of fish(not a good sign), or that they have to keep shifting the kind of fish they use because of overfishing(that's right, the FoF/catholic church, is destroying the environment!). It doesn't matter what kind of fish they use...they will just fry it up enough so you can't taste it. It's the other facets of the FoF that make it disturbing.
Cheese on a fish? It's been awhile since I was in a biology course, but I'm pretty sure cows live on land, and fish live in the sea. They were never meant to meet! You know something is wrong when the cheese is on the bottom of the of the sand which, it's a tact id admission that it doesn't belong on the sand which...cheese should never be a second class topping! They even only give you 1/2 a piece, which just makes it a show piece to make you think it will taste like any other sand which, but then you taste it....and it's too late.
I really need to start trying to convert people to my Friday Lent practice of having lamb(I love Greek food)...I go with the justification that Jesus was the lamb of God. See St. Peter mess with that logic when I'm standing at the pearly gates!
Aside: Notice how McDonalds has a mascot for all their food choices BUT the fillet-o-fish? McDonalds even knows it's bad.
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Things I think I think: March 2, 2010
1. We have the SAP feature on televisions for those that speak espanol, and closed captioning for the hearing impaired. But what we really need is a button to push so that the plot twists in movies and tv shows can be explained to those not so swift on the uptake...spare the rest of us from having to explain everything.
2. I've had one cup of coffee in my life, but I've found something else that will wake you up even better in the morning. I'll leave my contact case on the window sill overnight during the winter(aka 70 percent of the year). Put those puppies in...your awake. Brisk.
3. The Democrats are starting to remind me of the Simpson's with their insistence on continuing with this health care bill. They figure if they say "Will you take us to Mt. Splashmore" enough times that Homer and Marge(The American People) will just give in to shut them up
4. With the bevy of babes that James Bond has bedded, and the fact that I've never seen Q issue him any protection, I would expect that we were due a father/son Bond movie. Then I had the thought that the double O in 007 probably meant they had him fixed...snipped the boys right off and replaced them with something Q thought up....case solved.
5. I honestly think the preacher of the church down the street needs to set up a twitter account. He always has something "colorful" on the billboard out in front of the church. The latest is "Repent, Toyota isn't the only Maker that can issue a recall". I should stop in one time to experience a fire and brimstone service heh.
2. I've had one cup of coffee in my life, but I've found something else that will wake you up even better in the morning. I'll leave my contact case on the window sill overnight during the winter(aka 70 percent of the year). Put those puppies in...your awake. Brisk.
3. The Democrats are starting to remind me of the Simpson's with their insistence on continuing with this health care bill. They figure if they say "Will you take us to Mt. Splashmore" enough times that Homer and Marge(The American People) will just give in to shut them up
4. With the bevy of babes that James Bond has bedded, and the fact that I've never seen Q issue him any protection, I would expect that we were due a father/son Bond movie. Then I had the thought that the double O in 007 probably meant they had him fixed...snipped the boys right off and replaced them with something Q thought up....case solved.
5. I honestly think the preacher of the church down the street needs to set up a twitter account. He always has something "colorful" on the billboard out in front of the church. The latest is "Repent, Toyota isn't the only Maker that can issue a recall". I should stop in one time to experience a fire and brimstone service heh.
Don't Trust the Letter Y!
The letter Y, brought to you by evil Bert
Isn't the letter Y the most insidious letter? It just sits there at the end of the alphabet, not at the end where it might draw attention to its self, but far enough so it's still laying in the weeds. First it wants to be either a vowel or a consonant...never wants to be pinned down by a definition. Then it attached it's self to every word that by their very definition bring about feelings of happiness and an instinctual protectiveness(mommy, daddy, baby, puppy). See? Y is such a good and pure letter!
Once it had embedded its self in our cultural consciousness...it started to show it's true colors. At first it just spread its influence through the word whY. Why...always questioning authority. Then over the last couple decades the letter Y has been systematically replacing the letter i in common names(Megyn, Melyssa, Bryan...etc) All these people have been been marked by the evil letter....they can not be trusted! Think I'm crazy? What does the letter Y look like? That's right, a little i with horns on it...and if I remember my Indiana Jones correctly Jehovah(God) starts with an i in Latin! Y is trying to replace God!
That was fun heh.
Sunday, February 28, 2010
FBI Watch-List Candidate Right Here.
So once again I'm flipping through google images, this time under the search "pencil shavings" for an idea on another post. I come across this.
After getting over my incitial shock and awe I had to ask...
a) What kind of messed up mind comes up with this? I'm impressed.
b) I can't but wonder what the over/under is on the time someone would get a call from their childs school if they put this in their backpack.
via Gizmodo
Tim Burton just had a "special moment" looking at this pic.
After getting over my incitial shock and awe I had to ask...
a) What kind of messed up mind comes up with this? I'm impressed.
b) I can't but wonder what the over/under is on the time someone would get a call from their childs school if they put this in their backpack.
via Gizmodo
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